So I have this really bad case of performance anxiety. There is this up-coming gig tomorrow morning and I don’t know the songlist. I haven’t rehearsed in 15 years. I’m freaking out.

I’m sure this anxiety is what every mother-to-be feels as birth draws near. I remember great fear 15 years ago…fear of the unknown. Now it is fear of the known. I know how long this could take. And yes, I remember very well how badly it hurts… especially with induction drugs which intensify the contractions. I know what I face tomorrow. I’ve watched enough Discovery Health Channel and read enough “complications” sections of pregnancy websites to know just exactly how many things can go wrong. I’m freaking out.

But I am also old and wise enough to know that tomorrow will come and pass. The great apex of this nine-month-mountain will be reached and life will, more-than-likely-in-spite-of-all-the-freaky-shit-I’ve-seen-and-read, GO ON. It will go on with a new element. Routines will fall in to place, rolls will be assumed, and we will find it hard to think back to life before Miss Phoebe Jeanne Voorhees came into it.

And, in spite of all I face tomorrow…I can’t wait to meet her.